Monday, May 22, 2006

Loneliness

Chad called tonight, it was so wonderful to talk to him. He let me vent.Here he is off fighting in a way and he calls home to hear his loved ones voices and gets to listen to his crazy wife complain about how the boys aren't cleaning the playroom and bedroom. He listens, he talks to the boys and tells them to clean their rooms and listen to their Crazy Mom! Ok so he didn't call me crazy, but I know he's thinking it or should be! LOL

Now a few hrs after hearing his calming and loving voice, I just feel so lonely. I miss him. I miss being able to talk to him every single day. I miss his hugs and kisses. I miss him coming home and giving me a break, by taking the boys outside (or taking over playground time so I can come inside and get things done or just get 10 minutes by myself). I miss sitting beside him in the evenings and being able to talk to him about any and everything. I miss him in our bed, for all the reasons. He's my best friend. It's how a husband and wife should feel about each other, and I do. I think he doubts that at times. I have my best "girl" friend, but over everyone it's Chad. He has my heart like no other person, he has my trust like no other. It truly goes God/Jesus, Chad, etc. Again it's how it should be.

I look forward to him being home in a few months. He's been having a hard time dealing with loneliness too and missing us. I can't fix that for him, just as he can't fix it for me. He has I think a security in knowing I'm surrounded by amazing friends here in Germany and that I have wonderful friends in the states that I stay in contact with too, but he knows that I miss him. I hope he does, if you're reading this Chad....I hope you understand how much I miss you.

One day at a time. I'm sure tomorrow will be better, right now though I miss my friend, my husband.

 

11 comments:

sangrialel said...

Isn't it amazing how it is the little things that we miss when they are not here with us?  I will be keeping you in my prayers!  Linda

deshelestraci said...

I was thinking that I would miss Lou for all the reasons you said you missed Chad.  Especially the taking over of the kids for a while when he gets home at night.  Mine are like glue to my side and I have trouble getting the smallest things done sometimes.
You are in my prayers.
Traci

linnpooh said...

{{{{{{Christy}}}}}}  

Pooh Hugs,
Linda~

jckfrstross said...

{{{{{{{{{{Christy}}}}}}}}}}  {{{{{{{{{Chad}}}}}}}}

{{{{{{Boys}}}}}} you all need hugs

Deb

grahamfarmga said...

You made me cry. I hope time pass quickly for you.
God bless
Terrie

queenb8261 said...

Thank you for stopping by my journal. Thought I would stop by yours and say hello.  My youngest son, Tom just got out of the Army after 6 yrs.  He spent a yr in Korea and was in Kuwait when the war started.  Now he's a single, father of 2 (Maybe 3-his ex wife had a child and she had an affair last summer so there is some question of paternity). My oldest, Chad also, was in 7 yrs himself.  He missed this war thankfully.  He got out in 2000 but he and his daughter (he's also divorced and has cutstody of HIS daughter) and he were in Germany for a while. For the life of me I cannot think of the base though.  Our only daughter (28 middle child) was in the Navy for four yrs.  So you can imagine we are definitely militiary supporters.  I hope you will feel free to write me if you need to.  I know how terribly lonely and frustrated you must get at times.   I will be back to see more of your journal when I can.
Hugs to you and yours and thanks to CHAD,
Barb

fairylaura said...

Hang in the hun, he'll be home soon. I know I know.. easier said than done. It's good to vent to him though, that way he knows how you feel and knows what you're going through. However, he knows that you're doing such a great job with them. Everyone is allowed to their "day" and their feelings. You're such an awesome mother, wife, and person.

Laura

chevyz71gurl74 said...

Keeping you all in my prayers!
You are all so very strong...he will
be in your arms again soon ~ Keep the faith!
Hugss..~Terri~

scotthlori said...

Aww... so sweet.  It is obvious how much you love him.  Hang on, he'll be home soon!!

Lori

Who I am… underneath it all:  
http://journals.aol.com/scotthlori/DiscoveringMe

My Spiritual Journal:  
http://journals.aol.com/scotthlori/PreciousMetal


princesssaurora said...

It must be so very hard for you... I will remember you all in my prayers...

Thank you for your sacrifice...

be well,
Dawn

http://journals.aol.com/princesssaurora/CarpeDiem/

leanntepoorten said...

There's nothing like the love and friendship of the one you marry! I can relate to your lonliness...there are days that Pat goes to work and I just want him to be here with me. But there is a difference I know, he's 20 minutes away.

Thanks for your continued support and advice to me Christy. You have been a wonderful friend the last few days and I do appreciate that more than you know.